the spartan

today i realized i really dont have my priorities in order, that i put way too much towards a relatioship and not enough towards others or even school work. that really sucks of me because i was really hard on other friends of mine that did the same thing at an earlier point in time. i really hate that because ive come to realize that people expect a certain level of time (spent/ work) to be put into a relationship and when it lacks then they get all pissy and think you dont like them as much, or even that you dont like them at all. which is not the truth, i (know/ think) this because im feeling this right now, and yet know at the same time i have no basis for feeling this way. im so sorry but i really have to figure out my priorities, im sorry i haven't figured out them yet and im sorry i have built relationships like the tower of babel.

i really hate what im doing, i wish i could stop the train and get off, but the repercutions are just too much to bear, the difference between a little less and too much less is just too fine to fuck with. forever i'll wander in this land, im trapped forever. ive started every thing in motion for all the wrong reasons and no longer hold the keys with confidance. can i stay here? i wonder and wonder. it's not unbearable here, but it's only time before it is. does that mean that i should bite the bullet early? didnt i do that already, i think i did. it didnt work, and its the only thing i've ever regret. i should stay, maybe in the future my circumstances for leaving will be more tollerable. can't leave now, maybe i should try to naturally change it.

on the duality of my soul,

this weekend gamer zack is back which may or may not have something to do with the fact that mandy is like 4-5 states away in vigina reenacting the civil war. so while she's dorking out im also dorking out. yes that is correct corperate zack is laid to rest for the weekend. this means several things. here is an itemized list of those things.
1. nothing even close to work or progress will get done
2. im not shaving
3. mrs. lake is jealous
4. good chance i'll be playing games
5. you will be made fun of, no exceptions
6. (4) alot
7. i'll ditch people but not for other people, wait i did that last night
8. i'll make some gaming reference in every action i have with other human beings
9. 90% of those will go un-noticed
10. your mom
11. sugar will be consumed at every chance
12. i will probably live in a hoody

i have nothing to say at all, i guess that means life is going really good

last night my father was mugged by a rat, a gaint rat. it stole his wallet. so he got up pulled a chainsaw out of his back pocket started it with one hand and ran off after the rat screaming, " no you didnt bitch." i'll be having steak for dinner for the next year and a half.

i really am not digging life today. friends, always friends, nothing but friends. its the ethic of the rule not the paticular case itself that pisses me off. c' la vie. anyways i really dont want to wait till january to move i wish i could go today, but just think the new people you meet would probably be much the same as the people you already know. stoic. sometimes i wish i was a hermit that had a daily stuggle for life. heres to the good times of youth. long may they live.

ohhh man im finally triing at life, and thats kinda cool. on the other hand my proverbial plate is so damn big i feel as though i could be crushed under the weight of it at any momment. for some reason this is a good thing. 2005 is either going to make or break me as a person. everything will probably be different in january, i pray they are. if i spent my birthday with people i know, i probably wont be to happy with life. anyways i have to go to work now, what the hell.

its taken me a while but i realize i hate working here at jefferson rd and marketplace and that i dont like working in sales. i'm probably going to find a bull shit job at a resturant and just do that til about january, at which point im leaving and everything will change. so about that im either going to move with my parents to michigan in feb or im going go to college. it might be locally but who the hell knows? either way ive got to get my shit together before january.

i dont care who you are if you have ever had or currently own a cell phone then you have at some point bitched about some domb thing or another to at least one other human, there are no exceptions, NONE.

so i just found out that im not working at the eastview store anymore but instead im on jeff road for like 30 - 40 hours a week. im not really sure what to think yet, but i do know i wont have to work with jenn anymore so i dont have to hear her say rockstar anymore, and that is pretty cool.

yesterday myself paul and the estimable russo all went out for drinks, we were talking about our jobs and how nice it is to be able to walk away from people that annoy you. russo specifically said it must suck to work in a booth with someone you hate, im in the booth right now and absoltuley lament on that very topic, the girl im working with today is totally proof of that, she has in the time ive been in insulted me twice and said rockstar as an adjective of people about 15 times. id ont think she realizes how stupid she sounds, or at least how much like a broken record she does. i wish i didnt work in a booth.

i bowled my all time high today a 159. in all three games i played i got 3 straight strikes, turkeys if you will. that is all

My boss just told me after I told the story in the last post that how's the fishing is sometimes asked when a person picks their nose. In case any of those reading this also thought that rest assured that I was not picking my nose.

on a second note Isaiah hagan bought me a kung fu film I've been wanting and sort of searching for for years. Anyways on the DVD there was a trailer for another movie in the same series that was in the original Japanese. anywho it would display kanji on the screen from time to time sort of in a marketing way that would say things to encourage people to go see it. One of those was translated to "the largest snowfield massacre ever filmed." im going to up my search level for the rest of this series for sort of searching to actively hunting.

I really want a kyosera 7135, so much so that i told a guy yesterday i would switch phines with him and give him 150- 200 dollars. Not that this mean anything to any of you.

Today I was at work in the mall and a guy walked or rather was walking by and I said "hi" to him. He said "hi, how ya doing?" and I responded with the fairly normal human response of good. At this point he was about three to five feet past the booth where I work in and he sort of stopped and turned around and asked me "how's the fishing?" really as if think about it that man could not have said anything better at that point certainly not as random and funny as he did. I really had to stop myself from falling to the ground with laughter but I was just barely able to give him a "not good" for a response. That man was without a doubt in my mind a genius.

alright a post proper.

summer is great, i have nothing to do at all besides work so i usually play alot of videogames like every day. at least every day i have off, which is cool. lazy as shit but still cool. though it really makes me feel adrift at sea. i dont know why but i really dont have any strong interests in any carreer or field of education so i dont know what what to do with my life, because i dont really want to tie myself down to a major when i have no strong interest in it. if i dont have that how will i ever be able to get a career when im not sure if i'll enjoy it. that really sucks because i dont want to be this lazy i can't decide what i want to do guy. at least not any more. its funny when i look to the future i cant ever really see myself in any job nor can i see myself with anyone, if i was a stoic this is the part i'd jump the ship of life.

funnerals suck. i hope when i die i hope people just cremate me and throw out the ashes with the trash. i really dont undersatand the whole embalm-ment thing, were not egypt people we dont need to "look good for the after life." and the grave thing is just obcene why not just a cool picture on the fridge or something. the hole idea of having a place to visit in a strip of land that is filled with other dead people is wierd. i guess for some people its a spiritual connection thing but like i said a picture on the fridge would do the same thing.
i bring this up because of the reagan thing was just so stupid to me.the whole nation goes into morning, which is wierd its not like we all had coffee with him on every tuesday and that'd be some thing we miss, we in fact had little in common with him anymore, as a people.
im all over the place tonight i really wish i knew what was going on. iver noticed about half my posts are ok and half of them are crap this one was definately crap.

i liked riddick i will not say it was good as shit tends to be slung at the person who calls a movie they liked good when other people dont like it. but i still liked it and thought it was a good two hours to spend at the movie theater, for me at least.

i really hate opening up outlook for my email. its kinda like sifting though knee deep shit. seriously my penis is big enough my morgage is all paid off and i dont use perscription drugs nor do i have need of half price software. mr full size emailed me today along with 96 other spam bots.

zelda games are the dope that keeps me addicted to games. remember that scene from pulp fiction where travolta goes to the heroin dealers house and the dealer shows him like 3 types of heroin, zelda is like the third kind the kind he'd put up in the pepsi chalange with any of the shit from holland. i almost consider all other games as practice to keep my in shape for the zelda games. no im really not kidding you. i own or have owned and beaten every zelda game there is i cant say that about any other game series. hell one of my first games that i played was zelda on the nes when my brothers friend lent us his nes. somehow we lost the save data from it one day (i think we forgot to hold reset while powering off the nes) ths was when i was like 8 i got up super early on a sunday and played though the first 4 levels of it before my dad called for breakfast, i was so damn proud of myself. when i got my first game boy zelda link's awakening came packaged with it. i played the hell out of that game. must a beat it at least 7 to 10 times. still one of my favorites

i can understand why mike I. hates homeless people. monday night one flagged me down in the parking lot of blockbuster on monroe and keep fucking talking to me and tom after we had given him some change. i mean he didnt stop for anything even though tom said we gotta go like at least 4 times. if i was homeless i would just thank a person if the gave me change not sit there tell him my life fucking story and beg for more. Bo (and i can say this cause i doubt the guy can read much less has access to the internet) go eat shit. now normally i dont really dislike homeless people but this guy he was just stupid, he musta had no sence of hobo manors. like i said before someone gives you change you thank them and shut the hell up, and go away.

my new job is the cats pajamas. i have money left and right now. although somehow i depleted it all because the banks says i have none. i think m&t is playing jokes on me. whatever.


i really got nothing else for tonight. i still regret the past. next time i'll talk about funerals and the summer time. maybe i'll even post rules of conduct for the homeless.

your not funny.

annnnnd sweet... life took a serious upturn yesterday as i got a new job. ohh and tom should write music reviews.

scott.....what a f-ing loser. yesterday i was at work and bored, quite bored indeed, and rolled up some posters and hit scott with them. so he hit me back with a roll of paper towels, and we started hitting eathother harder and harder and eventually i hit him with posters mind you really quickly and it somehow gouged out a little piece of skin between his pinky and his ring finger. this was not a big cut maybe a quarter inch long but rather deep about as deep as long. anyways he got all scared and was like "i hope it doesnt get infected" and kept going on and on about the damn thing like it was some big deal that he was going to die from, he even compared it to when he broke his arm and when he smashed even bone in that hand. anyways he took it like a real puss. im tempted to go into work today and ask him how the injury of the century is. but doing that probably would only piss him off more. apperently he doesnt know how to take injuries well. anywasy hes a loser and i still need a new job.

ive realized that ive become like the people that i hate the most, that ive started to grasp for the brass ring and that life is futile for me. i wonder why i try.

i swear to god if i get or see one more bill/ticket/expence in the next like month im just gonna quit. seriously yesterday was the worst day i can remember, ever. for somereason i got up at 6;42 am which is like 2 hours too early i drop my mom off at work and go pick up tom and andrew andrew busts out the handicap parking thingie and i park in what i thought was a handicapped spot, no such luck it was the yellow stripped space so 35 dollars later i had a parking ticket in hand. me and andy went out to lunch after our class he paided for food which was mad cool of him, as we got to talking i reasized that ive gained about 3 friends after high school and only hang out with 3 that i used to got to school with, which made me realize the major champion of loserdom that i am. after dropping off andrew i went back too class nothing bad happened at class that was cool. after class i went home and my dad came in about 5 minutes after i did and asked me "dont you have ski patrol?" my responce was "i think i do tonight" he was like look at the schedual i think your on now, sure as shit i was i was due in at 4 and it was 415 at that point. i got there aboout an hour late, which is not cool at all. my second run down the hill i hit a patch of powder that spread my skis and made me flip around so i was skiing backwards for a second and then fall down hard on my chest first time ive fallen while skiing in like 3 years. i went home after my shift was up and somehow lost my wallet it took me like an hour of searching everywhere to find it in the second drawer of my dresser. then i went over to toms and hung out with him, which was cool but then i said something stupid and he slapped me and i hit him and he hit me, in the face and broke my glasses. im not mad at him i just dont want to go get a new pair of glasses on top of the two tickets i'll pay the gov't this month and the school thing and the cell phone thing and the gas in the car/food inmy somach thing. i was sitting pretty with money two days ago, then yesterday happened anywasy i got to go to the optomitrest now, hope i dont die on the way

Ladies and Gentlemen I have for you today a shocking (to some even appalling) bit of news that is with no doubt one of the most startling piece of recklessly, over-abundantly stupid, yet so intrinsically bound to mine yours and every ones lives that if one were to understand even a breath of a fraction of a decimal of its own insidious nature (which would be in our own best interests for safety reasons) that persons head would overheat like a hideously over-clocked processor, but instead of melting most people would have to watch TV or do something mindlessly irrelevant (for at least a month) as to ease the pain which it would cause, but thankfully no one can understand the sure beauty or majestic complexity or how painfully it diametrically opposes its own self with its seer unadulterated simplicity, ladies and gentlemen I Zachary john vanStaalduinen born on the 23 day of the first month of the one thousandth nine-hundredth and eighty fourth year of the year of our lord and savoir Christ son of God do proclaim to you that I pimp donuts.

man i really dont like the holidays, its not fun, and does a good job of pissing me off. more on this later, maybe. ive been pretty sporatic with my posting lately.

peace.

man i had a pretty good week end, with the exception of learning that my friend's wife has ms it went really well. i found out that im someones least favorite person. how awsome is that? someone likes me least. i'll make no excuses for my self im kind of an ass. and i must be a huge ass in order to find this funny but i do. the really funny thing is i dont think ive ever said a single word to her. the reason im given (for her not liking me) is becasue she doesn't like the way i treat her sister. i guess im a misogynist to her or something or maybe i just rubbed her the wrong way. its possible. i am kind of an ass, a huge huge ass who finds this all quite funny.
i also fell down and cut my finger all the hell up on saturday. in fact i should have gotten stitch's. unfortunatly that costs money or requires you to have health insurance i have neither. so instead im gonna have a nasty ass scare on my finger. go poorness.

i day dream too much, im sorry if this hurts you but i cant help it.

i passed my oec class yesterday. apparently i'll have what is known as free time on my hands... im so exited is could shfitz. but seriously that was the hardest class ive ever taken. 16 week, 36 classes, 140+ hours, and alot of miles on my car.

anyways i now have free time and that friends is beautiful.

I hate humanity, and that means you. I play games. I love games. This conversation I had with Paul tonight was intriguing, so I’ve posted it. I have edited it so for typos and it there was two steams of conversation going it would be more coherent for you now. (E.g. when I say "i.e. is shit" in the first segment I really chronologically typed it 3 lines down)
And I’ll be adding in comment as I go




soopermunky02 (1:17:59 AM): you should get an iBook
soopermunky02 (1:18:03 AM): $999
ALinkToThePast22 (1:18:15 AM): rainbow six anyone?
soopermunky02 (1:18:25 AM): huh...?
ALinkToThePast22 (1:18:40 AM): wait
ALinkToThePast22 (1:19:55 AM): http://www.raven-shield.com/
soopermunky02 (1:20:18 AM): no
ALinkToThePast22 (1:20:22 AM): yes
soopermunky02 (1:20:42 AM): no
ALinkToThePast22 (1:20:49 AM): I don’t think mozilla is supported on Macs
soopermunky02 (1:21:02 AM): you don't need mozilla
ALinkToThePast22 (1:21:07 AM): yes I do
soopermunky02 (1:21:07 AM): but yes, yes it is
soopermunky02 (1:21:19 AM): safari is better than mozilla
ALinkToThePast22 (1:21:27 AM): lies
soopermunky02 (1:21:49 AM): *nope
ALinkToThePast22 (1:22:22 AM): mozilla is supported
soopermunky02 (1:22:30 AM): yes it is
ALinkToThePast22 (1:22:37 AM): hundred of video games are not
soopermunky02 (1:22:39 AM): as is IE
ALinkToThePast22 (1:22:47 AM): IE is shit

Here is what began this conversation. I figured it was somewhat necessary to include the catalyst of this debate

soopermunky02 (1:22:46 AM): screw video games
soopermunky02 (1:22:52 AM): there's no need for them
ALinkToThePast22 (1:22:58 AM): yes there is
soopermunky02 (1:23:09 AM): what is the need
ALinkToThePast22 (1:23:32 AM): and Macs don’t support my main computing use
ALinkToThePast22 (1:23:40 AM): what’s the point
ALinkToThePast22 (1:23:43 AM): in Macs
soopermunky02 (1:23:43 AM): which is games?!
ALinkToThePast22 (1:23:57 AM): for the most part yeah
soopermunky02 (1:24:01 AM): dude...
soopermunky02 (1:24:04 AM): you're 19
ALinkToThePast22 (1:24:11 AM): and?
ALinkToThePast22 (1:24:34 AM): what’s your point
soopermunky02 (1:24:44 AM): if your main computer use is games, then that's a sad state to be in
ALinkToThePast22 (1:25:01 AM): I guess
ALinkToThePast22 (1:25:25 AM): I don’t see anything wrong with that
soopermunky02 (1:25:35 AM): dude...
soopermunky02 (1:25:44 AM): there's no like, upside to gaming
ALinkToThePast22 (1:25:58 AM): its fun
soopermunky02 (1:26:02 AM): no one respects you more after beating a game
ALinkToThePast22 (1:26:11 AM): its fun
ALinkToThePast22 (1:26:31 AM): no one respects you after watching a movie
soopermunky02 (1:26:38 AM): that's correct
ALinkToThePast22 (1:26:41 AM): but that’s not scoffed on
ALinkToThePast22 (1:26:53 AM): why are games
ALinkToThePast22 (1:27:04 AM): because you actually do something?
soopermunky02 (1:26:55 AM): but watching movies doesn't take up 30% of your waking hours
ALinkToThePast22 (1:27:15 AM): neither do games
soopermunky02 (1:27:14 AM): but you don't really
soopermunky02 (1:27:23 AM): you press buttons, in your home
soopermunky02 (1:27:38 AM): whereas watching movies is typically a social outlet
soopermunky02 (1:28:14 AM): wherein one leaves there home, to be with other people
ALinkToThePast22 (1:28:23 AM): yes because sitting in a dark room and watching a screen is really fucking social
ALinkToThePast22 (1:28:44 AM): have you heard of online gaming?
soopermunky02 (1:28:48 AM): yes
ALinkToThePast22 (1:28:53 AM): because they do that now-a-days
soopermunky02 (1:29:12 AM): which is still locking yourself inside of your house for hours at a time
soopermunky02 (1:28:45 AM): but you go with people, then do something afterwards
soopermunky02 (1:29:18 AM): and doing nothing
soopermunky02 (1:29:24 AM): but pressing buttons
ALinkToThePast22 (1:29:27 AM): but you have social contact
soopermunky02 (1:29:32 AM): no you don't
ALinkToThePast22 (1:29:33 AM): right
soopermunky02 (1:29:41 AM): you have typewritten social contact



What I said here: I play games, games don’t suck, online gaming is social, and movies aren’t social
What Paul said here: you suck because you play games, and games suck because they aren’t social even online, movies are more social.
My response to this: I admit that video games aren’t very social but then again not many forms of entertainment really are. Books, music, movies, paintings, sculptures, and TV none of them are really very social things. Now the few things I can think of that are social and entertaining are concerts and board games. Anyways I really love how people will cling to their enlarged TVs as social experiences. It’s a dark room with only a screen and some chairs in which you get shushed or thrown out for talking, that’s really fucking social. Pauls response is the usual one I get from people when I bash movies as social events "but you go with people, then do something afterwards." how 'bout this; we skip the movie, and just go strait to tom hortans in two hours. Most of the people that say that like movies a lot more than me. And I don’t know more than one person that plays games anywhere close to 30% of their waking time, that person isn't me. Anyways here’s more;


ALinkToThePast22 (1:30:24 AM): does the phone count?
soopermunky02 (1:31:41 AM): the phone's fine, but not as your only means of communicating with people
soopermunky02 (1:29:49 AM): which really just doesn't count
ALinkToThePast22 (1:30:13 AM): yes gaming =pressing buttons as
Art=scribbling on a piece of paper
soopermunky02 (1:30:37 AM): yeah, because games are played in galleries
soopermunky02 (1:30:47 AM): and admired for hundreds of years
ALinkToThePast22 (1:32:49 AM): art is more so a singular form of entertainment than is videogames
ALinkToThePast22 (1:33:04 AM): one guy paints it
soopermunky02 (1:33:05 AM): what is that supposed to mean?
soopermunky02 (1:33:49 AM): you can't the playing of a video game with the creation of art
ALinkToThePast22 (1:33:53 AM): and it almost has to be interpreted single-handedly for it to have any signifigance
soopermunky02 (1:34:03 AM): that's not true either
ALinkToThePast22 (1:34:30 AM): how so
soopermunky02 (1:34:36 AM): games never change, nor ever can have a deeper meaning attributed to them


To understand this it really it necessary to re-read the late several lines of the conversation.
When I said art here I really meant paintings. The reason I brought up art here is because its Pauls main use for his computer. but to be honest I really wasn’t going anywhere here other than to say that paintings aren't really very a. more social than games b. interactive my reasons for saying this were that because with painting the only person who is interactive with them is the painter and anyone who spends 30% of their waking time painting isn’t a whole lot better off than the one who plays games that much as that isn’t exactly a go hang with friends and do it activity. As for Pauls last line there that’s just bullshit, rpgs are story-like games that do and can have deeper meaning attached to them.


ALinkToThePast22 (1:34:52 AM): hahahahaha
soopermunky02 (1:34:56 AM): there is one or two formulaic ways to beat a game


That’s changing, games are getting more and more open ended there really is only one way to look at a painting


ALinkToThePast22 (1:35:00 AM): art changes though?
soopermunky02 (1:35:13 AM): yes
ALinkToThePast22 (1:35:16 AM): how
ALinkToThePast22 (1:35:31 AM): it grabs a brush and paints itself?
soopermunky02 (1:35:33 AM): not singular works, but progressive movements


Games also have movements and progression; more so than art does, shit look how we’ve grown over the last 30 years


soopermunky02 (1:35:50 AM): art imitates life
soopermunky02 (1:35:52 AM): games do not
ALinkToThePast22 (1:36:16 AM): really
soopermunky02 (1:36:29 AM): games imitate a mediocre and skewed perception of the way a few people want things to be
ALinkToThePast22 (1:36:38 AM): hahahha
soopermunky02 (1:36:41 AM): or wish, or imagine they were or are
ALinkToThePast22 (1:36:47 AM): right
ALinkToThePast22 (1:36:54 AM): hahaha


Paul’s line there about the "skewed perception of the way a few people want things to be" was cute and made me laugh. Painting can and do (just as easily as videogames) skew reality. pictures of Jesus Christ show a weird bodily glow surrounding him and a halo about his head, but I’d bet you a million fucking dollars he didn’t have any of that going on while he was here. But I digress, vgs unlike art don’t try to imitate life they try to entertain people, and do a damn good job of it. The video game industry does more business than movie or music.


ALinkToThePast22 (1:37:13 AM): Paul how many and what games have you played
soopermunky02 (1:37:20 AM): enough
soopermunky02 (1:38:43 AM): but what relevance does that have to this discussion
soopermunky02 (1:39:22 AM): but for a few more options, and another axis of control, as well as a quicker pace, there has been no change in them
soopermunky02 (1:39:40 AM): namely the control of games is unchanged as well
soopermunky02 (1:39:51 AM): along with the way in which they are viewed
ALinkToThePast22 (1:40:03 AM): because you can’t really disclaim videogames when the only ones you’ve played are ut2k and dead or alive extreme beach volley ball
soopermunky02 (1:48:24 AM): um...


If you haven’t really experienced what videogames have to offer then why do disregard them all.


ALinkToThePast22 (1:48:54 AM): games have changed when they began it was a ball and two paddles, now they tell stories, let one kill terrorists, make people laugh feel hatred and shit even sometimes people cry because of them
ALinkToThePast22 (1:49:18 AM): not me personally but it does happen
ALinkToThePast22 (1:49:37 AM): they do engage a person also
ALinkToThePast22 (1:49:50 AM): more so than any painting
ALinkToThePast22 (1:50:19 AM): a painting last for at the most like 5 minutes
soopermunky02 (1:50:51 AM): Quote: "now they tell stories, let one kill terrorists, make people laugh feel hatred and shit even sometimes people cry because of them"
ALinkToThePast22 (1:51:11 AM): but video games last for hours
soopermunky02 (1:51:17 AM): aside from the bit about killing terrorists, paintings have the same effect
soopermunky02 (1:51:27 AM): and what do you mean 'last'
ALinkToThePast22 (1:51:33 AM): engaging the person in there world
ALinkToThePast22 (1:51:54 AM): flowers last two weeks
ALinkToThePast22 (1:52:04 AM): pizza a day or so
soopermunky02 (1:52:17 AM): paintings are always there
soopermunky02 (1:52:22 AM): unless they're destroyed
ALinkToThePast22 (1:52:27 AM): and so are games
soopermunky02 (1:52:29 AM): or degrade after centuries
ALinkToThePast22 (1:52:59 AM): but the thing is the audience only looks at them for like 5 10 minutes
soopermunky02 (1:53:42 AM): yeah, but they're built upon a platform that needs to be powered in a stationary location
soopermunky02 (1:54:02 AM): ones emotional reaction to the thing depends on whether or no they're at home
ALinkToThePast22 (1:54:10 AM): I guess
soopermunky02 (1:54:49 AM): whereas with art, and this is any kind of art, they can retain the memory of the given image, or words, for as long as their mind allows them to do so


I've heard the Billy talent cd once and Sparta like 150 times, guess which one I will remember for a longer time, Sparta. The same concept goes for other things like paintings and videogames. when’s the last time you spent 10 hours staring at a painting, never you'd be bored out of your fucking mind, vgs on the other hand can have 100's of hours of playability thus a person could have a much easier time of recalling a game than a painting


ALinkToThePast22 (1:54:51 AM): ones reaction to a painting depends greatly on whether or not you’re in a museum
ALinkToThePast22 (1:55:36 AM): video games are a collection of sight sound and words
ALinkToThePast22 (1:55:58 AM): they fuse the three together unlike any other
soopermunky02 (1:55:59 AM): whereas games, in accordance with moores law, as any manifestation of technology, are within 6 months to a year outdated and limited in their scopes and abilities


More proof that we are growing and are awesome, do you see that quick a growth in any other form of entertainment, hell no.


soopermunky02 (1:56:11 AM): whereas plays do not?
ALinkToThePast22 (1:56:32 AM): when’s the last time a play asked you onstage
soopermunky02 (1:56:36 AM): and ones reaction to a painting is irrelevant to where they are when they see it
ALinkToThePast22 (1:56:48 AM): hahaha
ALinkToThePast22 (1:56:53 AM): as are games
soopermunky02 (1:57:00 AM): ok, games don't pull you into themselves
soopermunky02 (1:57:27 AM): they play out in front of you, allowing you a very limited range of interactivity


YOU actually play them out in front of you when I pause the game it doesn’t continue without me. And games do pull you into them more so than do paintings, play police 911 you'll understand.


soopermunky02 (1:57:53 AM): I mean, what if you were only allowed to move in a range of perhaps some 20 different ways
ALinkToThePast22 (1:58:00 AM): I could just as easily have an emotional reaction to a game at a friend’s house as I could at home
soopermunky02 (1:58:28 AM): including how you can interact with your environment, i.e. build, destroy, feel pain, etc
soopermunky02 (1:59:00 AM): yes, but not in a park, or driving in your car
ALinkToThePast22 (1:59:17 AM): you constantly bring crude control to the forefront of you arguments and while I make in now way a gesture that they are perfect they are getting better
ALinkToThePast22 (2:00:12 AM): and games are getting more and more interactive every fucking day
ALinkToThePast22 (2:01:06 AM): painting and sculpture have already from the first scraping on a paper or cave wall maxed out their interactivity
ALinkToThePast22 (2:01:50 AM): now I can move and it sees me: eye toy
ALinkToThePast22 (2:02:01 AM): now I can talk and it hears me: rainbow six 3, socom, shit karaoke revolutions grades you on your singing
soopermunky02 (2:02:00 AM): yes, I do bring control to the forefront because they are purported to be interactive worlds in every imaginable method, form and type, but really are not more than a series of buttons that are in no way a fraction of the way in which one can move in analog reality
soopermunky02 (2:02:40 AM): brb
ALinkToThePast22 (2:03:35 AM): Paul I never said vgs are interactive worlds in every imaginable method, form and type,
ALinkToThePast22 (2:03:55 AM): anyone that does is a fucking liar
ALinkToThePast22 (2:04:39 AM): that doesn’t mean that they don’t pull you in
ALinkToThePast22 (2:04:50 AM): just like a story
ALinkToThePast22 (2:05:33 AM): or even more so than with a story
soopermunky02 signed off at 2:05:46 AM.

In conclusion games don’t suck, and




Paul your argument that games have crude control is true but they are the only form of entertainment to have improved on that category sense ever. the fact is when I talk to paintings they don’t react neither do movies but some games will respond when I talk to them, games now also will respond to bodily movement. Does any other form of entertainment, no. now while games are limited in there controls they still have interactivity and while it could be described as crude it is something that paintings books and movies don’t have. That’s what makes vgs way the fuck cooler than movies or paintings and books.


i wrote this at like 4 in the morning it made sense then and i really dont want to edit it, but i do want to say that paul is an idiot.

i beat pikman the other day i forgot to post that

andrew told me to do this so i hope its funniers than it feels;

i like onion rings, maybe its because im lonely.
i like mozarella sticks, maybe its because im gay.
i like burger king, because it hates mike.
i hate Mc Donalds, because i like PC's.
i like chiken fingers, because i only have five.
i hate chicken wings, maybe its because i'm going to hell.
i dont eat fish, because im scared of drowning.
i like the meat of cows, because i could care less for the enviroment.
i like coffee because i hate going to the hospital.

i hope your happy andrew.



snuck isn't a work conan,
you went to harvard,
you should know that.

ohh i just deleted the post for 9/17/03 but i was there. it was an exact month. im not lying.

wow i find it funny that its been exactly one month since i last blogged. i think tonight may have just quenched my thirst to every see mike again. the entire time he didnt say a single nice thing to me. so i just left if paul was here he'd call me nancy no but hes not so im a nancy.

i just uninstalled i.m. and i feal better for it. no more pointless conversations for me.

i think andrew was onto something with that jeopardy thing of his. of course i dont think it was just that one instance, but that one time was a good jumping off point if one was to corralate the degeneration of society and jeopardy. that'd be a case that would have to start with strong evidence and theres a good freaking starting point.

im out prob. for another month i never have free time. and i like it this way. cult classic my ass. ass.

its been exiting lately if nothing else, my quest to play games on this pc of mine have lead to me buying a video card as well as a new motherboard. which is pretty hot cause its all happening for pretty cheap, and becase i'll have a better computer afterwards. work has been a little crazy too because half the people i work with got fired last friday. so i've worked every day since then and i'll be working allot for the next few weeks. (which is the reason that i couldnt hang with you mike on saturday when you imed me, i got out of work at like 10 and went to bed as soon as i got home) anyways theres allot of stuff i could put in here but i just dont want to i think im gonna go play pikman.

through the machinations of the penny arcade and their strip today i have become aware of a great cover-up at Mc donalds.
here are a few links to learn of this mystery
number one revals the demise of a great leader
number two gives the very same leader a tribute
number three shows yet another mystery of great intrigue.

i had plans but my car decided otherwise today as it desided to not take me where i have to go but instead to just spew the contents of it cooling system all over my driveway. the radiator has been shot for a while now but today its went down for good. hurray for cars!

sometimes i wonder if other humans think more than i do, sometimes i feel completely oblivious to my surroundings. but i never know what to do about it.

hi kids, i got alot of blogging to do althought this may end up a short post

first off: zelda
a. i realized why i liked that freaking game so much in two words: side quests. for me side quests are what makes a video game world feel alive. knowing that a person can say more than welcome to windfall island,knowing that they have wants, makes me feel as if the person is somehow more alive. now it doesn't make the person in anyway three dimentional, but it does make them at leasta little more two dimentional, which is good when creating a world.

b. those three traveling merchants on greatfish, mother and child, and bomb islands are not people their gorons. it took me one and a half times going throught the game to realize this(because i never really looked at them before) but they are most definately gorons.

secondly: Reid Ferguson
he blew my freaking conceptualized mind into little chuncks of none concepts. the main point to his sermon today was that the focus of life is getting to know God, it doesnt matter if you a "bad" christian or a "good" christian. he also made the point (in a very lewis-esque moment) that those groups that we like to associate ourselves with (e.g. pentacostal, evangelical, reformed, dutch reformed [which is to say going to hell]) is what gets us to God. it's instead knowing the father through christ. he said that its even bad to call ourselves by these names because if we do we start living by that groups standards and live up to that groups expectations forgetting what the true goal of life is.
one thing that he articulated that ive always felt is that we won't go to hell for being bad christians e.g. not whering wwjd braclets, going to movies, listening to secular music, etc. etc. now this doesn't mean we can go buck wild and freak 'til it falls off or do drugs, such things lead you away from Christ wheather you want to admit it or not. but listening to the mars volta isnt gonna buy you a one way ticket to hell.

alias season one is out tuesday which is the day i'll be getting it. i seam to be the only person i know excited about it but thats ok, if you ever want to watch it come on over, but call first.

here's a question for all of you, what if Darth Vader blogged. would it be the written equivalent of a "limp biscuit" (how ever you spell it (Fred durst)) or would it be poetic? maybe it'd be in ALL CAPS cause he's so pissed. would his words be spaced out like when he's speaking or would he write the sound effect of his breathing down "chghhh chghooo".

man today was a busy day. now I know what all of you are thinking but it wasn't busy with killing officers and storm troopers. so how was it busy then? well I captured han solo and leia organa today as well as that walking carpet that will soon join the empires slave forces, but I digress as I've already wasted too many words on it. I captured those two rebels and froze one in carbinite as a test for freezing Luke, who fell right into my trap. me and Luke fought I learned he's not yet a true Jedi which is unfortunate....for him. he fought well but couldn't handle me both dodging my light saber and objects I threw at him with the force. eventually I cut off his hand then whoo boy this ones a dosie, I told him about me being his father. that really threw him through a loop. anyways his ship got away, but this isn't the last time we will meet.

maybe something like that maybe nothing like that, man i wish i knew if you do contact me here

im out

im really supprised it have time to post this as i have like no free time the week-end which sucks as i have no time at all to study for class. i may just call in sick today so that i can study. anyways its been a busy last few days as i worked most of (9am-5pm) thursday and all day(9am-9:30pm) friday saturday i went to the state fair then to work. today if i go to work it'll be from 2-6 but i'll have to go straight from church to there meaning i'd be gone until like 630 at night. anyways i have two different people that want me to work for them this week one pays well the other i already agreed to so i have no idea how this week will work out. hopefully i'll work almost every day. anyways the state fair was fun if not short. me and my mom have gone to the state fair most every year since the fifth grade (i think weve missed two years) the thing is th fair never really changes and me and my mom have seen it all before, so every year it becomes a little shorter as we know our way around the place. and know what we like and what we can ship with out missing anything. one of my favorite vendors was gone this year which bummed me out but as they say c' la vie. i did manage to get my one token hockey card as i have every year that i go. now a days its about the only time during the year that i buy any cards as theres no good place around to get them. this year it was wanye gretzky "the great one". so until next summer i guess its the year of gretzky. which is cool cause the last two have been mario lemiux's years (i missed last year's fair).

anyways now that ive bored you all to death ill sign out and head to church.

sooo....... heres a story most of you will hate me for if you didnt alrready (if you did then it will compound the hate). anywho my house is under construction right now. the other day we poured a new foundation to the house so that the new walls we put in will be stable which is always a good thing. so of course we had cement trucks in to pour the cement. the first day was fine it was a front loading truck so it just left some heavy tracks that went down about six inches to a foot. now the guy had to pour in both the front and back of the house. going in the back he was fine but in the front of the house theres a septic tank which is about two foot from the top of the ground. cement trucks weigh alot and them going over two foot of ground and a thin layer of cement is generally a bad thing as it will crack the cement and could possibly go through it and sink. anyways the first day went fine but the second day we had a back loading truck that had to back up to the house. this was a problem. it cracked the ceptic tank. we didnt know about it but it did. cracked it right in the middleand left a fott and a half two two foot rut in the lawn. today i went out and was going to fill in the ruts that were left by the two trucks. i filled in the deepest rit first and got it right to the brim, no big deal. but being the smart worker i am i know that the dirt compacts so i go to stomp it down so it doesnt compact later and force me to do it again. as im stomping with my right foot the earth beneth it gives way as im stanting on it creating a hole about two foot around which i was sinking in. thats right folks I FELL IN A FREAKING SEPTIC TANK. luckly only to my knees. but still thats a whole lot more than i ever wanted to fall in one. im pretty sure the pant i wore during this are done for as i've washed them two times now and they still kinda smell. so im already down a pair of sandels as one of them fell in during the brief time i was knee deep in it. on the plus side i got a nice new pair of shoes for eight bucks.

anyways heres a humours conversation between myself (as fluteofthefallen) and the esteemed paul ganguly (as soopermunky02):



fluteofthefallen: so i fell in a septic tank today
soopermunky02: wow...
soopermunky02: that's...
soopermunky02: wow
fluteofthefallen: just to my knees
soopermunky02: wow...
soopermunky02: still...
soopermunky02: god lord
soopermunky02: *good lord
soopermunky02: so, you...
fluteofthefallen: hahaha
soopermunky02: wow
soopermunky02: how?
fluteofthefallen: i was filling in some divots made by a cement truck
fluteofthefallen: went to pack down the dirt and it gave way
fluteofthefallen: the top of the tank had been cracked but we didnt know
soopermunky02: wow...
fluteofthefallen: yup
soopermunky02: that is...
soopermunky02: disgusting
fluteofthefallen: yes it is
fluteofthefallen: its quite possibly one of the (if not the) worst things ive ever done
soopermunky02: that...
soopermunky02: yeah
fluteofthefallen: i dont want to touch myself and it was hours ago, i took a looong hot shower with much soap but still....
soopermunky02: wow...
soopermunky02: bleach
fluteofthefallen: i losta sandel in there too
fluteofthefallen: so i went to payless
soopermunky02: OH GOD...
soopermunky02: you were wearing sandals?
fluteofthefallen: .....yes
fluteofthefallen: w/ socks
soopermunky02: wow...
fluteofthefallen: yup
soopermunky02: that is utterly...
soopermunky02: wrong
fluteofthefallen: yeah

i appreciate toms last few posts a whole lot. they've been fun.

in unrelated news i got donnie darko on dvd the other day as well as monthy python and the holy grail today. office space and jay and silent bob come soon as well as kotor.

my oec class is going good but it makes me feel inatiquite if nothing else. anyways no one probably understand a word of this post but i'll have walls back in my house tonight and that makes me happy.

ohh yeah and man do i have a story for you guys tonight...its sick nasty.

thursday has a new cd coming out sept 16. i may just have it that week. anyways heres a message to those of you that think i never do anything: i just started a 140+ hour class. thats what like four and a half collage classes so fuck off. i am doing shit.

im out

change of scenery

i entered the car which was to be my prison for the next half an hour, only to be forgotten about in the future at some point. i was expecting a barrage of questions to make me regret my actions of the night before, but my foe was cunning only dropping two passive aggresive comments for me to respond to. fortunately my foe had underestimated me and over estimated her own actions, she failed to add my own emotional apathy to the equation. she missed the target, failed to put the knife of guilt in deep enough so it hurt she failed to twist and make me bleed. in the end i walked away unscathed, yet she had thought herself the victor and maybe she was, only time will tell. but now i have no regrets therefore i feel invinceable and so for now i win this battle.

more on the war later

man so many dumb things have happened around me today i dont know where to begin, maybe (i should start) with tom screaming out stupid things while sitting at the edge of my lawn and the street. or with one of the many stories that he and russo told me, none of which were flattering. or of verse or of fiction or of lyrics i dont know what,

i live in a world gone mad so as far as my blog is concerned ill catter to your wishes and write like a mad man sometimes making sence sometimes not today ill tease you with things ill blog of later

world gone mad

it turns out i'll not touch on this subject i if had i would've done it last weekend or monday but the one thing that i do remember is that tom yelled masterbation several times while sitting at the edge of my lawn and the street. i also know that andrew told me some really embarrassing storys about other people but to be honest i dont remember them all i remember is tom lake....damn you to hell tom, damn you to hell.

she swings with the ease of a hammer,
from the truth down throught the past,
and i know. ~sparta, red alibi

if you need a blog-sitter you can get me here

where have i been for the last week or so?

i was blog sitting here

so i have to say the hulk was good. in fact its the best marvel comics movie to date. even if stan lee had been less obvoius in his cameo it still would have been great. anyways on to the point of this rant. Expectations are the ruination of anything anticipated. who in the what where? just know this when someone is a fan of something and it comes out in movie format or is a sequal to a movie that they liked there opinion can not be trusted.

you ever get those day where youre brain doesnt work? it takes you forever to do menial tasks. cause i do and man do they ever suck. tonight was one of them, i could not concentate on anything for like more than 2 minutes. which sucks when your trying to do work. ohh well i'll just do a bunch tommorow.

hulk this week. ive heard critiques rip it up. and ive heard a friend who i trust say its good. and i dont trust the critiques.

we all die alone.

i knew that running mozilla, kazaa, outlook express, and having windows media player burn me a cd on a 256 ram machine with 64 of that shared to video was just asking for massive slowdown but it still didnt stop me from looking at my burner and saying "you ram sucking bitch"

that is all

and in a strange turn of events:
two blogs in one day!!

when i was a kid they always those commerials on where the parent asks his kid where he had learned to smoke pot. and the kid was like from watching you. havent smoked pot to this day because of those commercials but what i want to know is why didnt they have those type of commercials pretaining to paranoia. Maybe then i wouldnt be paranoid. yes i blame my pesamistic self on fran if thats what your wondering. She was freakishly paraniod and i think some of that must have rubbed off because im would catagorize myself as a rather brash fellow, just not around strangers. Now i know ive blogged on this before so i wont stay on this topic for too long but it bothers me the person ive become. im a walking oxymoron being both brassy and paraniod. and i never know when which hand should be played so im also a fool.

get the fuck out, just leave, get out your not welcome here.

the last week or so things have been fine. and by things i mean what happens around me and me reation to them. but what happens in me thats a whole different story. my mind has been constantly wrestling with itself. did i do it, or was it never really there i cant tell. i have evidence it was there. if it was there then i have no ability to sence other peoples emotions, and i hate my self for just reason as i have passed up all that could have been good in my life. it it wasnt there which the pessimist in me would lead me to believe as it very well could have been just sweet nothings that i read into then im doomed to the ravages of time for time itself hates me and gives me nothing but poor timing over the things i cant control but would love to. did i throw away everthing good in my life because i just wasnt brazen for once in my life. this thought train has consumed me and i want out. i want it to go. i need answers to settle the storm that has become my mind.

for those of you who read this rag tag blog and think you know what im talking about you dont. its not 10 and 11th grade coming to plague me again, im over that.

"i love you, i hate you, i love you, i hate you." - me if i could talk to my job

so yeah take that. if you couldnt desipher that ever so cryptic message at the top here it is in plain oxymoronic english: i love and hate my job. i get to work with games...thats cool. but i get tracked on sales. the thing is i dont really do good at them. thats not my fault though as i spent little to no time on the register. so what sales i do get are kind of mish-mash one here one there transactions. but none the less i get tracked and graded by them. we get tracked in several categories including units per trans(upt) preowns sales% and and selling a few thing that the company wants me to sell. If they are bad numbers i lose privileges if they are good then i get rewarded. its the same way for everyone. the way they check what sales are mine is that every time anyone enters into a transaction they punch in their employee number to start the transaction. today i found out that one of my bastard co-workers was logging on to "bad" transactions with my numbers. bad one being ones with low upt no pre-own sales and not selling hot items. so what this co-worker was essentially doing is hurting my sales numbers while in a way helping his own. so im pissed because that little mo-fo was ditching bad numbers on me while i was completely unaware and he knew there was no way i could check to see he was doing that. but today i caught him and left a note for the manager. i hope that bitch gets fired. its what he deserves.

til next time i'm out

"man those guys must think im really cool" me to myself

in fact they didn't. so the last few days were intresting. wensday tom and andrew picked me up and went to barnes and noble. and then spent the rest of our night playing super monkey ball 2 at tom's. that was crazy and yet again i proved that im rather obscene while playing games with friends. player faggot is up and those guys are probably never going to call me again. anyways thursday was one of those days where you have the highest expectations to do things with many different people and yet turned out to be the exact oppisite of that. to make things all the better i had had plans that night but i desided to fore go them with the hope that something better and more social. but that didnt really happen and now i gots to lie to the ones i skipped out on. im such a bastard

So Russo reminded me the other day of something that I did freshman year that I had completely forgotten. Now this wouldn’t normally have bothered me at all cause yes do forget things, we all do its natural. The thing is this wasn’t a good memory, so it could have been repressed. This leads to my question, if I could have forgotten this memory of my past loserdom they how many others like it have I forgotten? And if it is allot then I must be a total fucking loser right? I’d almost have to be because my self image (which isn’t positive) is made up of memories of myself, which because it’s negative, is mostly made up of bad memories. Now if the majority of the memories I have (of myself) are negative and I have repressed other memories of myself that are not positive then my self image must be rather skewed. So instead of being just a loser in my mind I’ve now been mutated into some sort of mega ultra loser of Sammy t proportions. Thanks russo!

Possible implications of failure come rather easy to me. I guess that makes me paranoid or something. But that’s not all that scary. Its when this skill (or byproduct of being surrounded by paranoid people all my childhood) fails me that is scary. I guess it’s that it has become so deeply imbedded in my "reason" -if you will- that with out it I simple don’t look at any other consequences at all. So with out paranoia I would probably be dead now. So while I lack foresight I have paranoia. Well maybe I should either start thinking ahead more consciously or continue to live my paranoid life. But the thing is even when I try to foresee thing I only ever see the bad stuff and so its and interesting cycle. but if I was to change and start thinking more consciously I’d only put "logical" reasoning behind my current silent paranoid urges which would only lead me to be more negative feeling of a person. But if I was to change 180 I’d be leaving all my reason behind me and that is a haphazard way to live.

ohh well its a good thing you dont come hear for my spelling.

i wrote this for a a lone wolf and cub "chat group"* but i want to save it forever so im placing it in my blog also:

hmmm....

I have to say that I dis-agree with everyone that says that lone wolf would make great movies or videogames. my reasons are numerous for both.
now I know that a movie series based on lone wolf already exists about which I've heard many good things (about the action, which is good I think that movie and its director(s) chose the right path by being purely based on action) but really all a movie could hope to do is to portrait the action in lone wolf at the same level as the comics present it. given that the modern American movie format is a two hour long movie (at the most three hours) it could do absolutely nothing in the way of character development in comparison to what the comic series did across its substantial 8400 pages of graphical novel goodness. now I know I'm only talking on my own behalf here but I cant believe that those of you who own all 28 graphic novels (or plan to own all of them) bought two hundred and eighty dollars in comics solely based on the action. I have to believe that at some point you couldn't wait to get the next book because you couldn't wait to find out what happens to ogami next.
another reason I have against the existence of a lone wolf movie is the loads of case history against comic-book-to-movie-crossovers. there's the superman series, and there's the punisher(1989), captain America(1990), the hulk TV movies(1989-90) and lastly daredevil(2003). now I know that daredevil grossed a lot its first weekend out(hype) it also dropped 20 million its second weekend which means that everyone that saw it the first weekend and told people it wasn't all that good.
while yes the last few years have been good for crossovers with x-men, Spiderman, and now x-2 and ill even admit that batman movies have usually rocked out (not the one with Clooney). but while these movies have been big financial successes they have all ended up disappointing and/or angering the hardcore fans of the series.**(with the exception of batman who has a very one sided personality of any comic book hero e.g. dark and intelligent)
my third reason is that I loved the series. it was good to me and I hold many great memories of it and I want to keep it that way. I think that a movie would only end up tainting that section of my brain that stores those lone wolf memories with a ultimately disappointing movie. the 2100 series has already done enough damage with its half hearted action and story.

as for a video game the reverse of a movie is true. while movies are short, games(especially rpgs) can last literally hundreds of hours. so that would make character development easier to pull of and way more competent than a movie. but its the action that ultimately would be easy to botch. the action in games is very easy to screw up though a few simple features of the game. the two most common features that kill games are the controls and the camera. both of these are fairly easy to fix although it cost a lot of money to do it. through lots of testing and feedback from the testers to the producer and programmers these problems can be fixed. unfortunately games often though games don't get the testing they should because the games development has a too low of a budget (like I said it costly). sometimes even big budget games like primal still don't get enough testing in (that game has some really weird controls). now it a lone wolf game was to come about and there wasn't a movie on its way or already out then it would almost certainly be low budget. if that happened it would almost defiantly bite and bite hard. the thing is even if those two features are spot on games still have many ways to go bad, every thing from bad graphics to poor acting to lack of gameplay depth to lack of originality to poor level layout to game difficulty to enemy a.i. to cheap boss fights can ruin a game in fact if any one of those elements is out of whack a game is almost certainly going to be a considerably less fun experience.
now even if all of the gameplay elements are great that still doesn't mean that the game will get the story right, which would ruin my probably end up ruining my experience with the game as fast as it would with a movie.

anyways that's my two cents sorry to be such a wet blanket! but thanks for reading all this if you did! if you have any discrepancies with any of this feel free to destroy this pseudo-essay one piece at a time.

I'm out,
zack

*if you can call it that its more of a message bored.
**every one i knew was pissed that gambit and beast where missing from x-men and spidermans organic webbing was quite possibly the biggest cross-over dissapointment of all time. peter parker it a freaking genious and one of the ways thats portaited in te comics is through his creation of the web shooter. peter worked in doctor o'connors lab
who was one of the worlds smartest men and was on the cutting edge of neo-genetic research and technology. but alas mainsteam america would never understand that so organic it is.

i must sleep now
zack

well i have to say yesterday was one hell of a day. so i woke up and pretty much just went to work. this is what i do on saturdays and it is very uninteresting. this is where my story starts: now four different versions of this night will surface but let me just start off by saying that now i did not play pikman at all during the night. anyways when i got home (from work) i called up mike as we hadnt done anything in a while. eventually after all was said and done me him and tom ended up at javas. mike then says "damn man i could go for a pint too bad arias is closed." and im like "ya man it does suck i could go for a beer now too." somehow that mystical land called canada came up in our conversation. now not knowing who you are i dont know if youve heard of this place yet. maybe maybe not. just in case i'll give you the low down. canada is a land that is not too unlike our own united states in fact you could say its the unofficial fifty-first state. but the beauty and wonder of canada is that un like the other fifty states they serve beer and other alcoholic beverages to people of the age of 19 instead of 21. this is a thing of goodness. the bad thing is that for those of the ages 19 and 20 is that upon hearing of it it becomes an obbesesion of sorts. there will be no stopping them until this land is reached. now both me and mike being of the said age caused last night to become very interesting. hears how it played. mike mentions canada i im like no way man we'll never get there and back in reasonable hours but his arguement was that it took a little over and hour to get there. this was our downfall. from this point on we had no choice in the matter. now this isnt because i believed it but simply because i considered it. i knew it took longer but we didnt know so mike went outside to ask katrina. she told him it takes like two hours. now tom was hear during all of this but as i remember it he had little bearing on what was to follow except that he was gonna be the designated driver. i think the reason i dont remember tom was because he wasnt really against the plan but when we (me and mike) took a shining to the idea he was all for it. anyways we desided to have an adventure and go to freaking canada. we told katrina this and her responce was to cuse at us for the stupid idea we had just created. but we (by now tom was totally with us) were set on canada. so shes like well shit i want to go too so were like hell ya lets go. so i go gas up the car and we were off we took 490 to i90. we had some good conversation on the way there as we were all excited about going to canada. now my moms car has easy-pass this lead to us chanting "easy-pass" evertime we got on or off the thruway (i90). anyways after aquick stop at a rest stop (where i learned that mike doesn't wash his hands after using the bath room) and at a tops (cookies!) we got to canada. yeahhhh! now to find a bar. we anyways after about a half an hour fighting over were we should go we finally found a bar/club. mike and katrina went in but tom couldnt get in as he was only 18. anyways i desided that tom as a dd would suck so i desided to take a swig of beer and wait outside with tom cause its not cool to wait alone. so anyways me and tom went to tim hortens and then to 7-11 eventually after an hour during which we found a rock solid alternative radio station we went back and picked up mike and katrina who were totally smashed out of there minds. anyways the trip back was one hell of a time as i didnt know where the fuck i was going at all. anyways i eventually found a cop who gave me directions to i90. by the time i got to i90 mike had peed 4 times(once on the side of the road) and i was about ready to kill his annoying self. but i didnt and we got to the thruway. by this time it was like 1:30. so i totally disregaurded the speed limit on the way home and was never really going any less than 80 mph and at times i was going 95. eventually after dropping everyone off i got home after 4 o clock am. which was not cool cause i had to work at 11 and i wasnt yet tired. but i fell asleep almost right away so that was good. anyways it one hell of an adventure-some night that will prob not be topped for a while. so heres to canada!

friday night and im all alone,
where all the lights are changing green to red,

so the judge just dismissed my case which was good cause i didnt want to pay no money for that (even though it was my moms.) anyways i had to sit through two hours of court to get it dismissed but it was all good cause i got to charge fran for it which means i got paid for sitting through the whole thing. the judge was rather cool too what with the cracking wise and all. so it wasnt as bad as the nightmare i had dreampt up. cause i totally saw my self going to jail and being in contempt of the cpurt for something stupid like swearing under my breath. glad that didnt happen.

man i got to go to court.... this really sucks and its all my moms fault. all she had to do was go to a police station that monday and it would have been all good but instead like the lazy person she is she just kept putting it off and putting it off and now i have to pay by going to court for her and fixing her shit. i'll explain this one later

i have to say feeling your mind come alive again after a two year nap is a really good feeling. back around 2001 my mind simple gave up. i coasted through my last two years of high school. i didnt try at all but i still passed. it wasnt hard. now finally my mind is returning, waking up, whatever you want to call- it its back. it decided to take a leave of absence two years ago because it wasnt prepaired for the emotional let down that life was handing me. and so ive lived in a daze for two years just trying to keep going hoping it would come back but at the time i didnt really know it was gone at all. funny because i knew it was going at the time. hell i prob joked about it. and now i can feel it coming back. slowly but surely i feel it thinking. how can i feel it? for the last two years except on rare occastions i havent been able to think on more than one level, i could never make more than one observation at one time.

hurry! for my mind returneth!

wow i have to say that people are both more fickle and dumber than ill ever begin to comprehend.

let me explain. today i was working at electronics botique. the phone rings. the asst manager is busy so i answer it. now every month we have a vom or vender of the month. the vender is some company that pays our company and in return we push there product like crazy. we give it 4 feet of wall space besides its regular wall/floor space to make it more visible. we also answer the phone say thanks for calling e.b. your home for said vender (this month is microsoft so its "your home for the x box") now this was the only time the whole night i answered the phone and it was the district manager on the other end of the line. i didnt know it was him but it was. he said something about the price and i told him the price of the xbox and he got all pissy with me and asked to talk to the manager and i tell him that the manager is not here and hes all pissed and like "why not?" and then asks to talk to the asst manager. the asst. manager takes the call and finds out that its the district manager who is our dm for like a week because the real one is on vacation. anways the guys an asshole and totally chewed out the asst man because i didnt answer the phone right and aparently was swearing left and right like baron von stuben, all because i answered the phone wrong. i have to say i really dont get it, not at all. how is my answering the phone any differently gonna get some one to buy an x box that wasnt going to get one before that? apparently corperate america thinks it will get people to doll out an extra 200 bucks. think again you fat bastards. i personally hope that coperations fall and fall hard. thats all for now feel free to email me at "alinktothepast@hotpop.com" with any arguements to this rant/blog

wow i thrilled with the thought that people might be reading this blog now because mike linked to it. but keep in mind that this site is boring much like thet life that inspires it. if you do want a witty blog then this is your ticket. of course i really dont know why it is that im so thrilled as like 4 people will ever see this blog.
anyways i really got to go get a job so maybe that will be this weekends job.

when life is so easy its also very boring

embrace yourself cause if you dont know one will.
the rants of a lone man

+first of the moby cd rocks.... thanks mike

i just finished golden sun i have to say that game has one wierd freaken ending good thing the sequal is out soon. but with that and diablo 2 dropped in price im really in a jiff.

anything else of interest.....no not really

maybe soon though

its tuesday back to the plus minus

+woke up and just did what i wanted

+hung out with mike jim and tom at the park/wegmans/bruggers/record archive

+bought the moby 18 cd as well as the cake fashion nugget cd

+parents left home amost right after i got here and took the dog with them.

+returned to the plus minus format.

lately....

-found out that i cant really add links in my blog and that sucks

-moby cd is skipping

-every side of my life is bitching aboout me not having a job

i thinks thats all for now until next time im out

friday night.

got like 90 dollors in free merchandice. and i did about no work, though the asst. man. did bitch like a pack of female dogs. good night! as i was driving home the sky was getting light up with transformer explosions. it was raining out and i hit a tree. really bad drive if ive ever had one.

this weekend my mom bought me a gameboy advanced sp. that thing is the dopest p.o.s. ever. i wasnt even planning on getting one... man thats sweet.

off course i finnally got power back today 6 days after it went out! ohh well. cant complain too much

somewhere between this world and that of sleep my mind wonders over the planes of should be could be and comes up with asinine plot lines of oddity.

heres one that it made as i had trouble sleeping last night.

im a black belt. i never tell anyone about it i keep it a secret. then one day i deside to tell an old freind about it. shes impressed. so she tells me to meet he at the movie theater in her home town. i say ok. the day comes when im soppsed to meet her and she calls me up and tells me to wear a hoodie in the theater. with the hood up so no one can tell the colour of my hair. i do so, when i get in she greats me with a kiss and whispers in my ears to not look but that theres someone thats watching us. i ask why and she says that she'll explain later. we go in the movie and the guy follows us in its freaking packed. we watch the movie and then get in the car. hes there. we leave the theater and she tells me to drive to my house. so i do and the guy is following in his car i try a hole bunch of tactics to loss him but none work... some how we end up going back to the the theater. we go in and the theater, and he follows we try to leave when hes not looking but he follows us out then he pulls a guy and asks her if she thought she could get away with it? and fires at me. i have a bullet proof vest on but it penetrates and i get paralyzed. then he gets arrested and goes to jail i move and buy a book of european names and pick one and change my name to that.

it was so much weirder last night. ohh well i cant tell stories

i hate nerds. fuck dungeons and dragons. i mean seriosly ...spelled that one all wrong... i work with morons and losers one in the same. #1 some 8 years of collage and not a degree to show for it. #2 two collage degrees and is an asst manager at a fucking game shop, go get a real job tubby #3 hates number two because he stole her job as the asst manager and does nothing but bitch of him #4 a classic d and der with no life at all. stupid proffesor frink wanabe. #5 well this one isnt a nerd and #6 me the worst of them all for staying there. this week will change things 7 days zack 7 days. i really do love lying to people about my job but ohh well im not one to bitch... i just write about it in my obbscure online blog. 7 days till i change it good

i have t say that this week has been really damn good to me. really damn good? ill stop writing crazy shit. hanging with tom was more fun than ive had i quite a while. that night was hard pressed to get any better. hung out with joe last night, with was also a ton of fun, the only way last night could have gotten better is if i hadnt gotten a ticket for my tail lights being out glad he didn't catch the windshield cause thats all cracked up. if i would only hang out with mike sometime soon then things will be all good. anyways if you going to swear dont screw up

jeez 20 days since i updated wow well i was on a trip part of that time so what can you expect? anyways i no longer have any form of a life as i play the new zelda about 65% of my waking time. that other 35% is rough. anyways went out with tom last night and had some fun. we saw punch drunk love which i honostly didnt stop laughing though, i was too funny. more later.....maybe.

5 days later...

no thing interesting this week trust me.

went and saw peter pan the musical at newark high school. one of my freinds was in one of the lead roles, wendy if you must know, and she wanted me to come see it so i did. it was really well done with wires and what not. shes one of those people who i've known and been friends with all my life. in fact outside of family i thing ive known her longer than anyone else. it kinda sucks that i havent gotten to know her better over the years but me and her arent really made of the same stuff so its not suprising at all. but its still not cool. that and the fact that shes moving away next year kinda hit me tonight. i have to hang out with her sometime.

anyways like all other things in my life ill just brush that off to the side and find some diverginary form of entertainment to replace my thoughts with.(maybe i'll learn to spell).

gotta get a hold of it all before it all falls from my reach

yesterday was fun went out after work an hung with mike. went to javas and got my ass kicked at pool twice before going to arias and then to a diner for food. it was a good night altogether because i had for the most part no worries at all. meet up with risi -an old class mate from finney and had a good talk for a while about the old school.....call sjf...... so that was cool.

funny that she was nicer to me than most of my friends from there were. they all cease to agnolage(sp) my existance. and i hardly knew her but she was actually nice to me. oh well "ce la vie" but i can still hate those motherfuckers right? i mean you cant take that away from me.

i paint such incomplete pictures,
til next time

todays blog comes tommorow

and for friday the last day of this shortened month:

got up played indy

dug a hole

went in to work

came home and killed some enemy jets.

i hate myself

anyways as for my doings today they go as follows

-got up left to go get food as my mom no longer has any food in the house.
(spent own money for food)

+came back and watched four hours of movies. full metal jacket and dracula. some damn fine movies.
(good watching)

-ate dinner it was angel hair pasta. i really hate that shit.
(yaaa bad food)

+played the third metal of honor for several hours
(not sure if i like it yet)

im out

so im just looked at the microwave and the digital display said 1.59 im like no way its that late. so i hit the stop key and it says 1:40. oh well i geuss that means it time for a bogg to be writen or rather typed.

anyways last night i new exactly what i was gonna bitch about and i totally forgot what it was. ohh ya yesterday i wroet i suck at what i do best. so ya i went skiing two days ago and i realized something, i suck at what i do best. skiing is without a doubt what i love to do. skiing is fun lots of fun. it one of the few things that ill never give up. but herein lies the problem. im not as good as i want to be.

i grew up skiing at brantling. the hill is small real small. no chairlifts just a couple of j-bars and a t-bar. because its so small i have like no endurence.i found this out when i went to bristol on monday. it not that im really technically flawed in any way, im on the national ski patrol for gods sakes. its just that i have no endurence at all. oh well i guess i dont suck but i still got to work on that shit, as well as transfer my patrolship elsewhere, like swan or bristol.

say no to darwinist lemmings
im out

ok so i still was pretty lazy about getting this shit up but its up.

yesterday went like this: got up, went skiing, realized i suck at what i do best, got home, left right away for work and did pretty much nothing while i was there.
it was a good day though

today, well it wasnt so great but not to bad. got up realaxed, took fran to work, played games, went in to work, came home finished highlander, watched clerks.

i'll have a real blog tommorow and i'll bitch about something, i promise.

till then
zack

getting lazier and lazier with this. oh well tommorow i dont have a thing to do.

mistakes were you,
mistakes were me.

+woke up, ate a waffle. every sunday my dad makes waffle or pancakes (usually waffles) for breakfast. good stuff
(waffle)

-played games. was all late for work because of the quarter inch of ice on my windshield/car. the rain from last night froze up and damn did i have my work cut up for me. went to work and did alot of nothing, the mall was really slow and three of us were on.
(lateness)

-came home, its one cold bitch out there. the driver side door was frozen shut but not from ice, it was so cold that the insides froze shut and wouldn't unlock.
(toooo cold)

going skiing tommorow
im out

in the back of my mind a voice speaks... spells out the master plan

short and sweet.

+woke up watched some tv.. had little interaction with people
all was good

+went in to work had some fun got some free shit. ate some of the most fattening pizza ever. im watching replacement killers right now so im out

be still, be still

added some links

while taking a page out of mike's book you can expect some music lines up hear from now on.

so todays events.

+woke up at my liesure did some stuff around the house took a shower didnt have to deal with anyone for several hours
(an all around pleasent morning)

-took out the trash and on my way in i stubbed my toe on the edge of a metal door. that woundn't have been so bad if it hadden't fucked up my toe nail at the same time. i think that i split it in half for most of the nails length. now it hurts to put socks on.
(fucking door)

+went in to work all painkilled on advil. had to work with the fat bastard asst. manager couldnt wait for him to leave. then i spent the rest of the night doing about nothing at all but register and talked it was an alright shift. drank two red bulls, that stuff tastes like shit i honestly dont feel any different after drinking it.
(got free stuff at work)

im out till tommorow

today went so similar to yesterday its scary. so just read yesterdays blog and that's pretty much how today went..... in case you didnt know i have no life. but i work tommorow so that should mix things up a little.

ok so i lied, i got nothing interesting to post ....or do i? i was watching tv tonight and i wondered what the hell people see in that shit. now i was watching it to so yes im a hypocrite, but anyways the only thing on local tv was american idol the bachlorette west wing and some news/magazine crap on cbs and i wondered what the hell am i watching?

show #1 american idol-- now theres a keeper. proof that the common american is nothing more than a lemming who is told by a tv show who there next favorite pop-chart singer is going to be. umm well ok i guess we all get our sence of self from somewhere.

show#2--the bachlorette that some really boring stuff. heres the show for you
girl spends time with a guy they kiss
next scene:girl spends time with other guy, they kiss.
next scene:girl:"i love them both who will pick?"
and repeat this for two hours
end show

show#3--westwing ok so who care anymore????? its gonna end up like er there evetually the whole cast gets replaced and no one can keep up with what ever the hell goes on anymore yet it will win acadamy awards for most boring show i mean best drama and people will watch it.

so i guess tv really sucks. ohh well it really does redeem its self with alias on suday nights though (at least in my mind) so i can complain too much. bring back family guy.

im out

and for today....

-i woke up and that sucked. fran (a.k.a. the women that bore me into this world for those of you who dont know) woke me up to get her some coffee/grub from mc donalds. she said its because she felt sick but i dont know. i think she just wanted some food and was just to lazy to get it. i had one of those parfait things (ie the heathiest shit on mcD menu).
(woke up to run a fucking errand)

+came home and after my mom left i tried to read a little
but insteat i took a nap. i have to say its been one of the best naps ive taken in recent history. and all was right again.
(goooood nap)

-woke up with one serious fucking head-ache and had a stupid dog barking at me at the same time.
(headache)

+played metal gear again....gotta find something constructive to do with my time.
(games)

ill prob add to this blog later with something more interesting than my day untill then im out

+this is my first post so hi. well that was dumb anyways welcome to my blog. by reading this you can kept in tact with all that happens in my life.......... well i guess this is also my last post as i dont really have a life and never really do anything interesting, but i'll let you be the judge of that.
(first blog entry and i have yet to make an ass of myself.... or have i?)

+anyways just for the hell of it ill write down what i did today. went in to work and returned a game that i had checked out. all none nerds skip the next sentance as you really wont care about this anyways. ok nerds i was playing panzer dragoon orta and it really quite good, never thought i'd have that much fun with shooter, they usually piss me off.
(pdo was a good game)

+okay non nerds you can listen again. then i went to borders and read some manga ohh maybe you shouldnt have come back ohh well. that was cool but it made me realize how much manga i want that i have no money for.
(relaxed)

+went to my moms work and picked her up after grabbing some pizza from marks. there really nothing in this world like a slice of marks pizza. anyways i rode home and on the way felt like sticking my head out the window into oncoming traffic, because my mom was bitching about the people who she works with. like i give a rats ass about those people. anyways i came home and played metal gear for a while and then i started to write this.
(pizza weights out my mom bitching, barely)

-anyways i gots to go im probably gonna read and eat dinner
(i'm leaveing and that sucks)